After cardio and posing this morning I feel amazing about everything and know that I worked really hard and had fun through out this process. A lot of people complain about not want to go to the gym but also bitch about how they wish they were "skinnier" or in better shape. The reality is if you eat well and go to the gym you will feel better and your clothes will fit the way you want them to. Training isn't always easy, but its my choice and I have loved my prep this year and I am very happy I took the time off between shows. I've come back stronger mentally and physically.
The hardest part of prepping that people don't understand is the competition withdrawl as I like to call it. It occurs the morning after you hit the stage and can last up to weeks! Being mentally prepared after your first competition is even more important. The morning after the competition is when the real withdrawl kicks in. You can sleep in. You don't have to train. You don't have to cook any chicken and you can just relax! It's a very weird feeling.
I remember after my first competition all I wanted to do was binge on all the foods I couldn't eat during my prep but now I love what I'm eating and what my body looks like that I'm not really craving anything because I know how it will affect my body. Don't get me wrong, I will be having a reward post competition but nothing crazy. I am going to take my time and enjoy sharing a few appy's with Brett and the team. Binging isn't good for your body or your brain. When you binge, your mind instantly feels guilty and this can lead to bad habits such as taking laxatives or throwing up what you ate. This is not healthy. Everything is about moderation and I plan on tracking my post competition eating because I plan on maintaining a post competition weight of 8-10lbs of my current weight. It's amazing how good I feel and even though I'm a little tired which I will fully admit, I am loving every minute of the journey and have fun each time I hit the gym and enjoy every meal. Even if it's TILAPIA!
Another thing I've realized is that some people are constantly complaing about competiting. I don't see the point in competing if you're not going to enjoy it. You have to have fun with it. Competing is one of the best experiences I have ever had and I have met some amazing people over the past 2 years and have also had the opportunity to share my journey with everyone which has also been something I've really loved. Writing was never (as still probably isn't) my strong suit. Mainly because I never proof read these posts before I publish them because I get into this crazy flow and write what's in my heart.
I have learned so much about myself over the past two years and learned to love myself which is a constant battle. Sometimes its really hard to stop and look in the mirror and love what you see. You will all think I'm nuts when I tell you that when I look in the mirror I don't really notice a change in my body, but when I look at my before and after pictures, I almost surprise myself. It's increbile to see how much my body has changed. Having that feeling of disbelief has helped me understand to some extent what some women feel after they loose a significant amount of weight. They still see their old self. The one they didn't like. It doesn't matter how many people tell you that you look thin or amazing, you still feel like the person before. You only have one life to live and living the best one possible is all that matters.
Some people think they have to lock themselves up and throw away the key or turn down every social event when they are training or working towards a goal but this shouldn't be the case. Yes, going out for dinner with me during my contest prep can see annoying but atleast I'm out! Give me some credit and support that I am training my ass off to be the best that I can be. People will always have their own opinon and say "one bite won't kill you" or "you can have a sip" but that's not the point. The point is that I want to be number one and I am putting all my energy into that. I'm sure I've driven some waiters crazy but it's what I have to do and I don't mind.
When you are choosing to live a cleaner lifestyle or working towards a goal eating out can be very intimidating and I can understand that. You get to the restaurant and look at the menu and your eyes start glaziing over and you get overwhelmed. Yes, everything declicious jumps out at me to but then I remember my goal and think how can I make this work. I usually go for salads with the dressing on the side and if I am really close to my competition I won't even look at the menu and just ask if they can cook a chicken breast plain and steam some seasonal green veggies without oil or butter. Yes, it sounds crazy but on Saturday night I was out with Brett and another couple and it's exactly what I did and they were more than accomodating. It's sometime Jessica taught me. Never be afraid to ask! It is a restaurant after all...
12 more sleeps.
Thank you for everyone's support! I hope to you will follow my journey on November 10th as I will be bloggin through out the day and will be posting a video blog of my day the following week.
Eat. Train. Sleep. Repeat!
Nic out.
xoxo
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